Often when I get discouraged I seek the calming words of a wise soul to control my emotions and understand the pain. This book has been a tremendous help in that area:
Pops let me borrow it a while back, and I keep flipping it open every now and then just to read a couple chapters over again. You can pick it up anywhere, start at any section, and get something useful and encouraging out of it. It is all about being mindful of what we are doing at all times, whether eating, walking, speaking, etc. It deals specifically with becoming aware (mindful) of our anger and the way we interact with it and others. He doesn't feel it is healthy to ignore or bottle up our anger, on the contrary, he wants us to love our anger, and nurture it as if it were our baby. Once we understand where it comes from, only then can we begin to calm it in ourselves and others. I love the metaphor he uses about watering the positive seeds and starving the negative seeds. It makes so much sense, especially in terms of a relationship. We must encourage the positive behavior, and find a way to turn arguments and negative energy around. By doing so the flower (and the relationship) grows healthy and beautiful.
Learn more about the fascinating life of Thich Nhat Hanh by clicking the picture below.
Here is his home: PlumVillage.org